skinblade

Collection of hope and helplessness.
With a glance i dismiss it. But i want to
sleep inside the mouth of bottomless bereavement.
I never knew you. I never wanted to know you.
I miss you so fucking much that I want
to sway with the trees but I can’t find the moment.
I sleep in sorrowful blasphemy. And you wait in perfection.
Beating me body and soul like it’s some sort of game to you.
I’d like to see you comfort me now with your special ways.
It’s no longer glamorous, is it?
I’m no longer special –
in the end.
You pretended. So good you intended to bring me up
but I fucked up.
And you blew me in to the aether like a kite into flesh filled decay.
Bring me. Bring me inside of your thoughts and I’ll…
Promises empty, as i say them, they’re empty and you wish me away.
I can see you on your altar. All glorious and full of light that i can’t
fit the sight of you in my bartered barrage of snarled sadness.
Oh, why can’t I feel
anything?
i want to feel
something
but you mock me from the afterlife all superhuman
and woman
and pretending I lived up to your potential, but i know
that i failed at being responsible.
I want to breathe inside of your ghost.
I want to leave it all inside of you but
I can’t seem to forget your loss.
It hits me when i don’t want it.
I want to cut you out but you bleed me in and today is not the day we
win.